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Morning Porn Report: Minneapolis, Sioux Falls Naughtier than LA, NYC, DC

Last updated on 2012.12.08

I had a nasty public pornography experience last night. While my daughter perused the books on CD at the Grace Balloch Memorial Library here in Spearfish, I turned and glanced at the cluster of computers next to us. One young man, a grungy, mouth-breathing space case, was gawking at a video of two people having sex. It was not an educational video.

I tapped Scuzzy on the shoulder, told him there were kids around, and told him to shut it down. I also said something about tax dollars that likely escaped Scuzzy's ken. Scuzzy clicked the X on the triple-X, but he didn't turn or say anything.

I'd spoken loudly enough that the librarian noticed. I called her over to kick the guy out. In the ten seconds it took for her to get to the computer, Scuzzy had reopened the offending video for one last look. The librarian sent him away. Scuzzy ambled off, silently and a bit unsteadily.

...which all gets me thinking about this fun link Mr. Kurtz sent me to the Men's Health "Smut Census." The writers managed to get data from the following sources:

  • the number of DVDs purchased, rented, or streamed (AdultDVDEmpire.com);
  • adult entertainment stores per city (StorErotica.net);
  • rate of porn searches (Google Insights);
  • percentage of Cinemax-subscribing households (SimplyMap).

I'm not looking any more deeply into these sources. I'm just reporting the rankings.

  • Orlando tops the list, beating #2 Las Vegas as America's smut-watching capital; evidently, Disney World isn't enough to make everyone's dreams come true.
  • Minneapolis ranks #5... but everybody there is really nice about it. Neighboring St. Paul ranks #29.
  • Anchorage (#9) is the only other really cold city in the top ten. Apparently there is no correlation between long winters stuck inside with nothing to do and switching on the pay-per-view.
  • Colorado Springs, home of Focus on the Family and other theocratic organizations, ranks #48. Sioux Falls is purer of thought at #68. But both good Christian cities are smuttier than Los Angeles (69!), New York City (#76), and Washington, D.C. (#80).

If I see Scuzzy at the library again, I'll show him this list and recommend he take a trip to Disney World or Minneapolis... and stay there.

15 Comments

  1. grandma 2012.05.08

    Good for you. I thought those sites were blocked on library computers. Proud to be your mom!

  2. John Nelson 2012.05.08

    Cory, you might be interested in finding out about the free speech fights that have gone on regarding the use of public property to view offensive material like this. It's not an easy call. I thought the librarian might be coming over to tell you that you couldn't stop the kid. It's been some time, but there was a fight at the library in Minneapolis about just such a case. Just what is the ruling on such use?

  3. caheidelberger Post author | 2012.05.08

    One can never block all sites. And John, while you know I love the First Amendment, I think that the public display of obscene video, especially in sight of children, may be actionable under public indecency laws.

    In one Minneapolis case, I see that librarians won a settlement for damages when the library did not take sufficient steps to curtail patron viewing of porn at work.

  4. D.E. Bishop 2012.05.08

    Mpls is #5, while St.P is #29? Damn, they beat us at everything!!!!

  5. Bill Fleming 2012.05.08

    That must be why they call those Minnesota guys hozers, aye?

  6. mike 2012.05.08

    Good for you Cory. Kick Scuzzy out!!!!

  7. Carter 2012.05.08

    You could also use this same study to determine which people are the least internet savvy. In this day and age, people shouldn't be buying porn to begin with!

    As a side note, what kind of person would even WANT to look at porn in a public space? That alone is pretty pervy sounding. It's like Pee Wee's Placehouse in there.

  8. Laura 2012.05.11

    I was a librarian in St. Paul for years. People will do ANYTHING on a public computer. I remember my supervisor coming into our office, shaking her head in dismay and saying, "I just had to kick a kid off the internet for looking at Taco Bell Dog porn."

    At least we were able to kick people out if they were behaving inappropriately. We felt sorry for our colleagues across the river, who weren't allowed to do that. The director of the Minneapolis Public Library had chosen to take the American Library Association recommendations on free and unrestricted access to information very very seriously. It's fine up to a point, but when you have sexual offenders hanging out in your computer room having themselves a time, I think you need to step back and use some common sense. I'm glad the Minneapolis librarians stood up for themselves.

  9. larry kurtz 2012.05.11

    "Pornography is the elephant in the pews, says Craig Gross, who produced the video and whose sermon is featured in it.

    "The statistics say that 48 percent of Christian families are dealing with the issue of pornography in their home," Gross says. "I would say the other 52 percent are just unaware of it being an issue in their house.""

  10. Vickie 2012.05.11

    Good for you Cory. I'd have told him to shut it down as well. Ewwww...in a public library of all places. Creepy.

  11. Steve Sibson 2012.05.11

    "Ewwww...in a public library of all places."

    Glad to see you know how to draw lines of restrictions.

  12. caheidelberger Post author | 2012.05.12

    Vickie, being a dad puts some questions about social boundaries in sharp focus. Laura, that's a really interesting note on the difference in policy in two neighboring jurisdictions. I appreciate the First Amendment perspective, but I'm with you on the need to protect staff and children from harassment.

Comments are closed.